Friday, November 25, 2011

About Teeth

I have a recurring dream. It's kind of like the, 'I'm walking down the street and everyone is looking at me funny, Oh Damn! I'm completely naked' dream. What? You haven't had that dream? No not the one where everyone else is naked! That's a different kind of dream. I mean that dream when you are in what would be an otherwise normal public setting, like at work or school or doing the shopping. And... then... WHAM! You realize that you'd forgotten to put clothes on before you went out. To my nudist friends, please imagine that this is not something you normally do!

Anyway I'm not talking about that dream now either! I'm talking about the TOOTH Dream! 
I have this dream that all my teeth crumble and fall out of my mouth. It's not a nice dream. Although there is no immediate fear or consciousness of pain, I just get this terrible sinking feeling like my teeth are my life and they are falling from my mouth like grains of sand through an hour glass... (or a 7 minute glass in the case of our egg timer). I sometimes dream that my teeth are falling out and it gives me a strange sense of impending doom.

Now everyone knows that teeth are pretty important. Eating is one of my favorite activities, without teeth I would find it more difficult and less pleasant. To loose ones teeth is not a superficial thing! For many people, before dentistry became popular or a sanitized affair, and before processed foods were available on the market, I'm talking way back, in this country about 200 years ago. If a person lost his or her teeth, unless a close friend was prepared to pre-masticate their food, or they had a decent supply of milk, the toothless wouldn't last very long. In many early human societies the teeth were used as an important tool for survival. If you didn't have good teeth you would have been far less effective at a whole lot of important daily duties, like making string, chewing sinew, stripping the flesh from animals and fruit, cracking seed pods, etc... etc... How long do you think you'd last if you couldn't chew your food?

I can definitely see why my primitive sub conscious associates the loss of teeth with calamity, defeat, and death. However I don't how my primitive sub conscious is able to remind me of this just a week or so before I actually loose a tooth! Or at least a bit of one anyway!

A few weeks ago I had the dreaded tooth dream and then just this week I was chewing on a Mintie (OK bad move!) when I noticed a bit that was harder than the rest. At first I thought it was solidified Mintie but when I felt the loose piece clang against one of my remaining teeth I knew for sure! I've broken another tooth! It was a pretty big chunk too. What a bummer! Now I'm wondering how young I'll be when all my teeth are gone! Thankfully there's no pain but I know I'm gonna have to get the thing fixed, I hope they don't want to pull it!

I'm not too sure why my teeth are so week but I have a few theories.

1. Caffeine, (I drink a ton of it and have heard it depletes calcium.)
2. Sugar free cola drinks (there's no sugar but heaps of caffeine and a bunch of nasty chemicals)
3. Too much sugar (It's possible but I'm not such a sweet tooth)
4. Opening beer bottles with my teeth (Haven't done that for a long time but I don't suppose it did my teeth any good)
5. Eating ice (A friend got me onto it years ago when we had no money... I kind of got used to it, At least it doesn't make you drool red bile and spit, like an anesthetized camel!)
6. Too many years of falling asleep with the 'whitelady' or one of her friends and forgetting to brush my teeth before collapsing into unconsciousness. (Hey when you're all charged up and living for the moment who's seriously going to march off to the bathroom and brush their teeth? It just wouldn't be the same!)
7. Genetics (Probably! Nothing I can do about that one either)

It doesn't bother me so much to loose a few teeth. I don't like paying to have them pulled but I've enjoyed plenty of steaks in my life and am happy enough on a vegetarian diet these days anyway. Besides during these days of affluence and highly processed foods a person doesn't really need his or her teeth, except for social reasons like smiling at a potential mate, new employer etc...
But the world is changing quickly, I have a strong sense that teeth will become quite a useful tool in the post peak world. I sure hope the kids don't end up loosing their teeth too, I reckon they're gonna need them!

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